How did I miss this?

As no surprise to many people who know me, I'm kind of a nerd.  Yeah, I know.

Anyhow, I love love LOVE me some Iron Chef.  I prefer the Japanese edition, but Iron Chef America isn't bad either.

Until ... I realized how amazingly adorable Michael Symon is.  How did I not understand his deliciousness before?

At any rate, he's a doll.  And he can cook for me any time.  Panda and I keep saying we need to make it to his joint (Lola) in the hopes that he'll cook for me and I can cross an orgasmic experience off my Bucket List.  However, seeing as how he's got a new show on Food Network (aka "Porn For Women"), I don't think that he's in the kitchen much anymore.  Sad Mrs. Panda.

No no, shhhh.  Don't cry. I still want to shag you, Charlie Swan.  You're still my number one boy-toy.

This weekend was made of FAIL.

See, I had the best of intentions with this whole "Blogtember" thing.  You know what they say about the road to hell, right?

Anyhow, yeah.  FAIL.

Friday morning brought me to my stepdaughter's IEP intake meeting.  She has binaural hearing loss, mild to moderate.  She also has inattentive type ADD.  Oh, and a proclivity to lie if the mood strikes ... as it does pretty much every time her mouth moves.  The meeting went relatively well, with the psychologist planning to do some executive function testing to help the teachers help her learn more effectively.

As we were leaving the school, I noticed that my back passenger window was down.  I thought to myself "self, that's odd.  You didn't leave that down, did you?"  I tried to roll it up and a disconcerting crunching noise occurred.  I almost vomited.

After making a $400 donation to MAG BMW, my window regulator was replaced.  I know this is an issue with E46's, but still I am PISSED that I had to borrow money from Panda (his "my kid screwed up and doesn't get to go to Disney money), and I'm PISSED that I had to waste it.  Well, it's not wasted, but you know what I mean.

Saturday brought my stepdaughter getting assaulted by some neighborhood punks in the front yard because of what she was wearing.  My formerly nice neighborhood has been run over by morons that think it socially acceptable to form a "community" and exclude everyone else.  Then they allow their children to assault others, because they don't like the color of their skin / religious preferences.  Um, not OK.  So the cops were called, a report made, and now my kids can't go out in their own front yard and play.  Awesome.  I was already considering Catholic school for the kids, and I think that this is pushing me even further toward my decision.

Today, as a result of not sleeping much last night, I laid down for a short nap after Sports Reporters ... and slept right through 12:15 Mass.  UGH.  At least I finished making most of our shirts for Disney.

Speaking of Disney - I now have New Moon and Twilight on iTunes and my iPod Touch for the trip.  My daughter is excited - she's wanted to see Twilight for a while and I'm saving it for the airplane ride.  

This week will suck - I just need to make it to Friday. I can do this!  This time next week ... I'll be a college graduate!  My dad, his lovely wife, and my grandma are coming down to witness the ceremony.  I haven't decided what I plan to wear yet.

Time for bed.  Just watched a damn good Cowboys loss. 

Dear Immune System:

Why hast thou forsaken me?

Here we are, just 25 days until we leave for Disney.  And I've got what is likely the tail end of a sinus infection.  I thought it was allergies, then maybe a simple head cold.  But clearly, it's more than that.  It's been a week, and I feel horrid still.  And very tired.  I'm hoping that this is the end of the nonsense, since I don't have much time to get back on the straight and narrow.

This weekend needs to involve lots of prep for the trip, and I have very little energy to do it.  My to-do list involves:

• Purchasing my daughter a new swimsuit, as she's outgrown all her others
• Returning the skirt and jeans that I purchased without her, as she moved up a size in the past month
• Exchanging the t-shirt paint I purchased for more feminine colors ... I bought red, black, and gold ... I think FusserBug will want her Spiral Mickey Head Shirt to be very girly, since Panda and Princess LiarPants aren't going now. 
• Ironing on all the transfers I've gotten completed already
• Having Panda order a new printer, since ours took a dump
• Picking up a few pairs of shorts (on clearance at Avenue) for myself
• Meeting my daddy and his beautiful wife for lunch at 1 on Sunday
• Making the transfer shirts
• And I'm sure about a kabillion things that I've forgotten.

I also want to make it over to the dollar theater to see Eclipse.  OH and I need to pick up Twilight and New Moon on DVD so that I can add it to iTunes and to my iTouch for the trip.

But the most important thing?  COLLEGE FOOTBALL STARTS TOMORROW!  Hurray for GameDay!

Yeah.  No rest for the weary.

My nerdy-ness knows no bounds.

Sadly, I've devolved really far into fangirl-dom.

How, you ask?

I've stalked the local dollar theater.  They started running Eclipse today.  I'm wondering just how many times I can go see it before my husband thinks that I'm clinically insane. 

I had planned to take my stepdaughter to see it.  However, we've had some serious behavioral issues lately ... starting with lying and finishing with forgery.  She lied about homework, lied about her planner assignment at school, and then forged my husband's signature to the pages where a parent signature was required.  So unfortunately, this causes her to not be able to go to Disney with us.

Although I understand why she can't go, I'm not happy at all.  I've put tens of hours - maybe hundreds - into planning this trip.  And she couldn't stop the lying long enough for us to be able to take her.  I'm so pissed.

I'm more pissed that I won't get my anniversary dinner at Narcoossee's with my husband, more than anything.  I'll enjoy my week with my FusserBug (my daughter), but it'll be bittersweet for sure.

Off to bed.  Fighting a nasty cold, and tomorrow is September 1st.  I plan to go balls to the wall and post SOMETHING every day in September. 

Speaking Of The Matching T-Shirts ...

I'm working on getting the t-shirt transfers created over the next few days.  I plan to print them and take them with me to iron on over the weekend.

Usually, several friends and I go to the cabins to scrapbook the weekend away.  And by "scrapbook" I mean "drink".  But instead of working on my woefully inadequate scrapbooks, I will be spending the weekend working on our matchy-matchy t-shirts for Disney.

I finally finished my shirt design for the Halloween party:

Yes, that's the Twilight font you see.  I couldn't leave the opportunity to join a few of my favorite things - Twilight, Mickey, and video games (for those uncultured heathens, the artwork is actually from a Game Informer cover).   So now I need to figure out what to do with Panda's shirt ... I have the paint Mickey from the Epic Mickey game, and I just don't quite know what to do with it yet.  I have a few days to decide.

The kids go back to school tomorrow - WOO HOO!  For the last three months, Panda hasn't really dropped the hammer on bedtime.  So sadly, this means that my alone time (and "alone time", giggedy) has been severely curtailed.  I really am looking forward to having the necessary peace and quiet after 9 PM.  I love my kids.  And I love them a lot more when they're well-rested and not stalking me all evening, thanks.

37 more days.  Well, in about 20 minutes, about 36.  But hey ... who's counting?

Playing catch up, and more.

According to the Twilight Examiner, Nikki Reed hasn't yet seen a script for Breaking Dawn.  She also wants to join the cast of True Blood.  Well, seeing as how I don't watch that show, she can just go there.  I won't miss her. 

The kidlets have their shoes, all their supplies, and are officially ready to go back to school.  I think I need to pick up a few new shirts (they have jeans that they haven't grown out of yet), but other than that I think they're good for school.

I picked up all the remaining t-shirts that were needed for our Disney trip.  Panda's digging in his heels that he isn't going to wear matching shirts on a few of the days.  So, in honor of his refusal to wear said matching shirts on a few days, he'll be the proud owner of one of these.

So there.

Off to finish consolidating our iPods.  I got a new-to-me Touch.  Panda will get my old Nano (a few generations ago) and the kids have new Nanos.  I just backdoored Panda's old Shuffle (heh heh that sounds so ... kinky) and pulled his old files off of it.  Fuck you Steve Jobs and your DRM bullshit.  You are no match for my mad Windows-based computer skillz.  iTunes won't see the file structure on the super-old shuffle?  Eat a bag ... I'll just backdoor in.  SO there.

OK now that I've gotten that off my chest ... I still have a flaming burning hatred for Rosalie.  And hey, while we're at it ... I wouldn't mind shagging Charlie Swan. 

More tomorrow. 

Slacker

I have really tried to make a point of writing every day. However, I am simply exhausted these past few days.  Between work and back to school activities, I am drained by the kids' bedtime. 

I'm going to go snuggle my Sam-Cat and my hubby. 

Unicorn Watch, Day Two.

So, this lovely news story came out today, courtesy of SBNation.com.  As told to my Panda ... real men read Twilight.  To which he scoffed, and was quickly reminded that his righteous indignation might be better served by someone not wearing a "Ghostbusters" t-shirt.

Anyhow ... off to the article ... Enjoy.


Patrick Kane Reads "Twilight" Book In Bed, Gets Sold Out By Mom

by Andy Hutchins • Aug 15, 2010 4:08 PM EDT 

Even though he won a Stanley Cup this year, it's hard to forget that boyish-faced, mullet-wearing, cabbie-miffing Patrick Kane is still really young. It makes sense for him to be into the same sorts of things "the kids" are into these days. Like, say, the final installment of the Twilight saga. Take it away, Patrick Kane's mother!

It was his mother, Donna, who caught the 21-year-old in the act — of reading a book. While the fourth installment of the "Twilight" series isn't exactly Tolstoy, the image of Kane in the bedroom of his Buffalo childhood home, curled up with a book instead of carousing on the streets of his hometown, is fairly startling.

That will probably get brought up during training camp. I wonder, can young Patrick save himself with a good reason for reading Breaking Dawn and figuring out what happens to Bella and Edward?

Uh, no.

"Ohhhh," Kane said with a laugh after regaining his composure. "She would throw me under the bus like that. I watched the first three movies and was really interested … so I decided to read the fourth book. I kind of snuck it in there, and she walked in a couple of times with me reading the book. I tried to hide it, but it wasn't happening."

Now, a 21-year-old hiding a book from his mother is probably cute to someone, somewhere, and it is nice that Kane owned up to his taste. But a tough hockey player reading a book about the consummation of an epic vampire love story—and only after being intrigued by the mopey, angst-ridden movie adaptations—is a recipe for ridicule.

Unicorn Watch, Day One.

I attempted to gauge the possibility of revealing my husband's inner Unicorn today.  I'm not encouraged, but I'm not entirely discouraged either.  Loose transcript of the conversation:

Me: You know honey, I think I'm going to go out to STL to see Breaking Dawn with TwihardBFF.  That'll mean two trips out there next year ...

Panda: You're going to fly.  On an airplane. To see your silly vampire movie.

Me:  It's not silly, and it's not all about vampires you know. 

Panda:  Really.  Because Cedric Diggory brooding about a whiny brunette isn't silly.

Me:  Oh, this judgment is valid from YOU?  The man wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt?

Panda:  At least it's not a bullshit teenage movie series.  I hate that crap.

Me:  There's a thin line between love and hate.  Just sayin'.

So there you have it.  I am a firm believer that hate and love are both passionate emotions, and the opposite of both is apathy.  Panda's not apathetic.  Hmm.  Maybe I'll turn him while on the airplane to Disney ... if I only have Twilight in the carry-on to read, it'll either be that or a two-plus-hour flight of listening to his daughter say ARE WE THERE YET ARE WE THERE YET OOOH CAN I HAVE A DRINK ARE WE THERE YET?

Unicorn Watch continues ...

And then we continued blissfully into this small but perfect piece of our forever.

Today is August 13th.  Oddly enough, it is Bella and Edward's wedding day.  How fitting that today is Friday The Thirteenth, no?

I know this is a bit of a shock to those who know me in real life ... but I'm kind of a planner.  I am a bit of a "Type A" control freak.  Stop that laughing.  Anyhow, I love all things wedding.  I suppose that feeds into my need to control/plan things.  I suppose, of all the characters, I'm very Alice after all ... I like to drive fast and flashy cars, plan all sorts of things, and have an uncanny ability to know what will happen if I just follow my gut.

Anyhow.  Wedding.

InStyle Magazine did a huge "Plan The Wedding" spread.  Some of the stuff I liked (invitations and flowers), some of the rest of it was NOT what I envisioned at all.  I simply adore Reem Acra's philosophy and style, and I think that she's probably the most likely to create the gown for the Breaking Dawn movies.  Maybe Lhullier, I did note a very suspicious looking gown (albeit more lacy than I think Bella would wear) in her Spring 2011 collection.  At any rate, I'm interested to see how the vision I have in my head will play out on screen.

It's also been decided - I'm going to STL to see Part 1 with my Twihard BFF.  I bet her hubby will go with us, he's a Unicorn*.  I've seen the official release date as 11-18-2011, but I'm failing to understand why they're not going with 11-11-11.  Maybe they will eventually choose to do so, but I suppose for now that it's going to be 11-18-11.

I've also decided to try a little experiment with my In The Closet Unicorn ... my Panda.  I think I'll rack up my Twilight Saga books and see if he touches them.  I'm interested to see if he can resist the draw of the pretty black covers ...

And in case you wondered where the "unicorns i love them" tag came from ... check out this YouTube video / song.  Heh.

* Via my current favorite TwiSite, Letters To Twilight:  Unicorn: The name given to the mythical creature of that of a man who loves Twilight. We write about them all the time.

I’ve decided that if I’m going to Hell, I might as well do it thoroughly. - Edward Cullen

Ever have one of those days where everything you touch is just ... crap?  It seems like you just can't do right by anyone (or anything), and you're thisclose to being reduced to a blubbering crybaby in your office?

Yeah, me neither.  ***innocent blink***

Everyone around me is just "off their feed" today.  My kids were more bickery and bitchtastic than usual.  Most folks at work were exceptionally mean and "gimme gimme gimme NOW".  Even Panda and I got into a nasty little tiff about total bullshit tonight.  And really, I have no reason to be whiny.  Lots of good things are happening right now, including:

1. We leave for Disney in 47 days.  Well, today's almost over, so let's call it 46.  Hell, 45 and a wakeup.
2. The trip is 100% paid in full.  In cash.  Our hotel room (at the Polynesian, no less), all meals, all non-alcoholic drinks, all snacks, all park tickets - EVERYTHING including $50 per kid spending money - is paid for, in cash.  I only have to worry about spending money for chotchkies and other random crap.  Of course, I'd like to have about another $500 cushion, but whatever.  I could have downgraded the hotel to a Moderate, but the idea of being crammed into a small room with my stepdaughter and her recent proclivity to whine for no damned reason is just too much for me.
3. You People will eventually learn about number three.
4. I am not Rosalie Hale Nikki Reed, therefore I am not a frigid bitch that appears to be in a constant state of lemon-sucking. In hindsight, maybe this should have been number one.
5. School starts on August 23rd.  Not soon enough - my kids need SOMETHING to do.  I have a theory that their piss-poor decision making and the increase in whine-ocity has something to do with their complete lack of any project of substance.

Indicative of my kids' behavior today, this conversation transpired just prior to dinnertime:  "Hey kids, what do you want to eat - ravioli or hot dogs?"  ..... pause to hear kids' answer .... and they say, in unison ... "OH TACOS! TACOS SOUND GOOD!"  To which they were told "Look, only one of you is actually hard of hearing.  The other clearly enjoys the sights and scents of having her head up her own ass."  (credit to my Twihard BFF for that one, told you I'd use it later.)

Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot.

At any rate, I think I'm just going to go to bed. Alone.  Panda is happily snoring on the couch in the basement, and really a deluxe pillow-top queen sized bed all to myself sounds pretty damned good.  And if that means I'm going to hell ... so be it.  I'll enjoy it, and like Edward ... I'll do it thoroughly.

The Results Are In.

hose damned My final grade is ready to go.  I can't believe that my undergraduate career is finally over.  After sixteen years ... I'm done.  Sixteen years.  Relocating 150 miles from home.  A marriage.  A child.  A divorce.  The appearance of my Panda.  The loss of my mother.  The disappearance of my Panda.  The reappearance of my Panda.  Marriage in Jamaica.  Becoming insta-mom to my now 10 1/2 year old stepdaughter. Three jobs, five cars, and a partridge in a damned pear tree.

Anyhow, sixteen years are up.  And I'm done.

Until, of course, I start back to pursue my MBA in November.

I thought that I'd feel differently than I feel today.  I thought I'd be jubilant, ecstatic, even giddy.  But no.  Right now, I feel almost ... scared.  I guess that I've been at this for so long that I don't know what to think.  As a good friend said, sometimes we prefer the evil that we know to the possibilities that we don't.

My lovely husband relinquished the TV tonight for 130 glorious minutes.  I got to watch New Moon in 61" of hi-def 7-channel surround-sound glory.  Ahhh, it was lovely.  I got my Pack on in peace.  I think that it's likely my favorite book and movie so far.  This runs counter to most of my other Twi-types, I know.  But I really like the ancillary stories ... the Quileute tribe, the Volturi, and even the rest of the Guard.  I think they did a great job casting Aro.  And I still want to donkey punch Rosalie.  I know I'll like her better in Breaking Dawn (but not all that much after all), but I still want to grab her blonde hair and crack her one.

Off to watch Top Gun for the eleventybillionth time, and to crash out.  I'm rather sleepy.